The Hunger Games

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Year:	2012
Country of origin:	USA
Director:	Gary Ross
Genre:	Teen-tedium
Starring:	Jennifer Lawrence, Josh Hutcherson, Liam Hemsworth, Donald Sutherland
Rating:	1/5
IMDB link:	http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1392170/
Tagline:	May the Odds be Ever in your Favor
Favourite line:	None worth mentioning

Scoring the third largest box office haul on its opening weekend, the buzz seems to indicate this is one teen-sensation that growed ups can enjoy, too.

The plot:
In District 12, a young woman, Katniss, hunts a deer using a simple bow and arrow. She’s honing her skills, at the same time as trying to put food on her family’s table.
It’s the day of The Reaping, when one young male and one young female are selected from each of the twelve districts, to enter an area of conflict, and fight to the death in The Hunger Games.
The purpose of the games?
To remind the citizens of their sinful past, when rebellions rose up and destroyed the land of plenty; to make them thankful for the little they still possess.

Trailed by high praise from trustworthy sources, and with promising comparisons to excellent genre fare, this was walked into with much optimism.
Whilst the first hour does deliver the goods, to an extent, this is somewhat sullied by the mind-crushing tedium of the final hour and a half.
Telling effectively the same story as the Japanese cult classic Battle Royale, but taking half an hour longer to do so, the pace is punishing.
The certificate, too, is a problem. Gone are any signs of the old ultra-violence – a necessity given the subject matter, one would have thought – and in their place come veiled suggestions of nastiness and lots of running around in a forest.
Look, when the grisliest scene involves a wasp’s nest, you know the horror quotient has been toned down, somewhat.
Two hours in, just as your arse-nerves are beginning to feel the full brunt of the boredom being inflicted, then comes ‘the romance’, as cynical a piece of emotional manipulation as I have seen in quite some time, but one that had the silly little fucking girls sitting at the back of the screening giggling, presumably as their first sexual squirtings trickled down the inside of their thighs. Shame they couldn’t be hurled into a gladiatorial arena and forced to fight to the death.
I’d have enjoyed watching THAT.
Bland, toothless, lacking in any level of intensity or ‘shock factor’ – seriously, don’t believe the hype – this is only saved from a total lambasting by the performance of Oscar nominee Jennifer Lawrence in the lead role, who is very, very good indeed.
Other than that, a total damp squib.
Do yourself a favour folks, watch (the subbed) Battle Royale instead.
What a crock of shit.